love/hate

i have this love/hate relationship for you right now.
i hate how you've controlled my emotions and controlled my mood for the past few weeks. i hate how you've confused me with ur actions and flirtations. i hate that you've been in my dreams and have consumed most of my mind. i hate that you're not interested and that you have her now.
but what i hate most of all is myself; for overanalyzing everything and thinking that i actually had a chance. i actually put myself out there and pushed myself to be less shy; and yet i still failed. i can't ever be good enough. i also hate that i'm still interested, still having some form of hope. why is this? i need to get over you and move on!
but i can't blame you, because you didn't know what you were doing to me...